The Road Back from Nowhere

 

My latest writing project is a book with the working title, “The Road Back from Nowhere.” None of us ever intend to get to Nowhere, but unfortunately, many have found themselves there before. And for some, it is often. You can find yourself in Nowhere and still be in the middle of your everyday routine.

 

It is similar to a sailing term known as the “doldrums”. Occasionally, a sail boat will hit a patch of water where the winds just stop blowing. Without wind in the sails, there is no way for the vessel to continue on the journey. It can last a short time, or in some cases, a very long time. Those onboard the boat have no recourse except to wait it out. Hopefully, they have enough supplies of food and fresh drinking water to make it.

 

As Christians, we have a clear directive from scripture, given to us by our Creator, as to how to escape the drifting in the doldrums, or how to navigate our way home from Nowhere. It’s called prayer. It’s the lifeline we have, 24/7, to reconnect to the very One who gives us life.

 

The parable Jesus shared that has become known as “The Prodigal Son,” even though Jesus never called it that, gives us some clear insight as to what we need to do if, or when, we find ourselves in Nowhere: return back home to Father!

 

One of my favorite songs from one of my favorite groups from the ‘70s and ‘80s speaks to this very thing. TRUTH used to sing a song called, “All the Way Home”, written by Bill and Gloria Gaither. Read the lyrics below and then listen to the song. I hope, like the prodigal, we find ourselves heading back toward home. Father is always waiting.

 

All the Way Home

 

My rebellion I called freedom took my birthright in its hand

And I woke up in the pigpen of a distant alien land.

But I saw myself this morning, dared to see what God can see,

And admit I’m lost and lonely, so tomorrow, tomorrow I will be

 

On the road back home to Father, I’ll not stop along the way; 

I was born for higher purpose. I’ll not waste another day.

Won’t be camping on the border just inside of what I’ve known;

It is all the way or nothing, all the way back home!

 

Never been a halfway person, all or nothing is for me;

When my footsteps lost direction. I was lost as lost could be.

But at last I’ve learned my lesson, learned from many a troubled day;

Now that I have started homeward, I’ll be goin’ all the way

 

On the road back home to Father, I’ll not stop along the way; 

I was born for higher purpose. I’ll not waste another day.

Won’t be camping on the border just inside of what I’ve known;

It is all the way or nothing, all the way back home!

 

Words by Bill and Gloria Gaither

© 1979 by William J. Gaither (ASCAP)

Springtime

Springtime, when everything seems to come alive

It never died, just went dormant for a season

Then suddenly, life springs from death

Giving hope, when there seems to be no reason

 

With warming sun and abundant rain

The cycle begins anew

Budding trees and flowering plants

All blessed with morning dew

 

Take note, my friend, for your own life

Tho lifeless it may seem

Can quickly go from doldrums drab

To see your wildest dream

 

Like the seeds waiting patiently

Buried in soil and dormant

Burst forth to become a beautiful sight

At exactly the right moment

 

Time is still in front of you

If you only have eyes to see it

Don’t let the weariness of life

Cause to give in and quit

 

As long as the breath is in you

As long as you rise at morn

You have a chance to have the dream

Just waiting to be reborn 

Day's End

 

Day is ended, nothing really left but memories.

I pause and wonder if there was anything left unsaid, undone;

Any harm caused to others; any love left unshared.

Is anyone different because I was alive?

Am I different because of the lives I encountered?

To get lost in these thoughts can lead to passive living.

Too much evaluation and not enough celebration.

 

Touch those you can; avoid those who intend malice.

Speak a soft word of greeting, thanks, forgiveness.

In doing so you bring light into darkness.

Peace into turmoil, hope into despair.

The love of God into your world.

Never

 

Never is a very misunderstood word.

When you speak it, you mean it with everything that is in you.

Life has many choices; some intentional, some unintentional.

The outcome can be expected, or unexpected.

 

Sometimes never gives place to maybe.

It is not a planned event, but circumstances bring new perspectives.

Experiences temper resolve when unforeseen possibilities emerge.

A new decision is then required.

 

Remaining with the proclamation of never seems noble.

But what if your premise was flawed from the start?

Never, based on not knowing all the facts, can seem certain.

But certainty is only valid with all of the information.

 

Walking away from never can mean defeat.

Or reconsidering never might open up even greater opportunities.

Those which only come after never has run its course.

Now rooms for new commitment have been opened.

 

Never rarely only involves the one who uttered it.

Others can get swept into the current of the promise.

They have choices of their own which brought them into play.

But a rescinded never can hurt nonetheless.

 

Never always has an end, even though none is implied.

When you see something beyond never, hope arises.

The self-imposed sentence of never can be revoked.

You can be released to a life only imagined.

 

There is a place in every life for never.

Without certainties, life can be chaos.

But never cannot override your will to find peace; love; happiness.

For it must always bow to what is right.

Alone - a Poem

Being alone is hard, especially in a crowded room.

You wonder why no one notices, then

You see it in their eyes as well.

They simply have a better mask.

Why must we all pretend to be happy, to be well.

Our culture has pressured us into a mold

Created by the minds of a few

To build a better society.

It’s easy to see why some retreat through drugs,

Destructive behavior, and even death.

Without a beacon of hope in their midst

They become shipwrecked without a future.

If you have a reason for waking in the morning

Share it with those you encounter.

You could be a glimmer, a brief glimpse

Of a future worth living.

Thoughts and Intents of the Heart

If any of you follow me on social media you know that I enjoy humor. With all the chaos in the world we need to laugh when we can. Occasionally, I post serious things; usually personal experiences or thoughts. The other day I had an epiphany that I was a cynic. Just so we’re clear, the definition of cynic is: a person who believes that people are motivated purely by self-interest rather than acting for honorable or unselfish reasons. I do not believe this about all people, but I found myself thinking that I knew “why” someone did what they did instead of simply taking the actions at face value.

When we begin to think we know “why” people do what they do we become judgmental and condemning. Hebrews 4:12-13 tells us, “For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart. And no creature is hidden from his sight, but all are naked and exposed to the eyes of him to whom we must give account.” (ESV) The Word of God is the only thing that can discern the intents of the heart.

The Word, referred to elsewhere in scripture as the Sword of the Spirit, can separate motives from actions. I cannot. The only person I can truly know the motives behind actions is myself. The only way I can discern if my motives are pure is to measure them against the Word. This is not as simple as it sounds. We can talk ourselves into thinking that most any action can be justified. This is one of the reasons for the busy-ness of our society. We keep ourselves occupied so we do not have time for introspection; the time required to judge the thoughts and intents of our heart.

In one of the devotions I did during the 21 Days of Prayer, I shared on 2 Corinthians 10:4-6, which says, “For the weapons of our warfare are not of the flesh but have divine power to destroy strongholds. We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ, being ready to punish every disobedience, when your obedience is complete.” We take these thoughts captive by, first of all, spending time contemplating our own actions to determine the “why” behind our actions. If our motives are found to be impure, we must submit them to the Word of God – punish disobedience – by confessing our failure and accepting the grace from God to destroy the arguments and lofty opinions which try to displace His Truth.

So, from one recovering cynic to another (hopefully), let us consider our own motives and leave the motives of others alone.

Blessings!

Dudley

Another Father's Day ... Without a Father

 Another Father's Day ... Without a Father

I grew up without fathers. My paternal grandfather died when my father was only a child. My maternal grandfather died when I was eight. My father died when I was nine. Father's Day did not have much meaning in my life, until I became one!

I became a father sixteen years after my father died. I was beyond anxious. I did not have a clear image of what a father should be. I did not have the benefit of seeing fatherhood modeled for me in my teenage years. And now, I had a son. I was now a father.

Looking back there are many things I wish I had done differently. I blew many teachable moments with my children because of the fear of getting it wrong. Well, I got it wrong. A lot. Somehow, all three of my children have become amazing adults. My sons are both amazing fathers, in my personal opinion, in spite of me. I give their mother most of the credit for how they turned out. She balanced the scales by being such an amazing mother.

If you still have your father, regardless of the relationship you have with him, go see him. If needed, ask forgiveness. More likely the case, forgive him. Realize that he tried. Even if he got it wrong, know that he tried. Tell him you love him. Tell him you are o.k. Just tell him something. I realize that it is his place to reach out to try to mend broken fences. Reach out anyway. Your father has something that you need. It's part of God's plan. Even if your father blew it, he still has something that you need. Try to redeem lost opportunities by restoring fellowship.

It's easy to justify bearing a grudge when you have been wronged, especially by your father. I know the questions. Why weren't you there? Why did you do that? Why did you not love me? Why? Why? Why? I've asked those questions many times in my fifty-two years of fatherlessness. Here is my conclusion that led to a totally different outlook on fathers and fatherhood. I forgave my father for dying!

During a counseling session years ago (the one and only time I remember seeing a counselor) I came to realize that I was holding my father responsible for many things in my life. He was my hero. He was a super-hero. A man's man, rough and rugged, smelled of Old Spice and foot powder. He could do anything. A police officer, a sergeant in the Reserves, a Boy Scout and Cub Scout leader, a deacon, father of five, still married to their mother, a loving son to his aging mother, handyman to the widows on our block, could rebuild a V-8 in the backyard, and on and on I could go. How dare he up and die when I needed him the most? How could he abandon me in my time of greatest need for a father, a mentor, a provider?

My father never abandoned his wife, family, friends, church, etc. His life was taken from him while trying to protect the citizens of Birmingham. Just so you know, God did not take him, as some ministers tried to convince me while grieving in the hospital waiting room. My father was only doing what he had sworn an oath to do: Protect and Serve.

After forgiving my father for dying, and realizing that it was ME that had placed him on a pedestal which no man deserves to be placed, I was able to process many things that led to my own inability to father the way my children needed. It came many years too late, in my opinion. I have asked their forgiveness. I have committed to be a better father, and now, grandfather, so that I cause no further emotional harm to them.

Back to Father's Day. Reach out to your father. If possible, see him. If not, call, FaceTime, Zoom, chat; whatever you have the ability to do. Give him some slack. You may have no idea why he did what he did. Regardless of the reason, press toward reconciliation. Even if he rejects it, you can live from this moment with a different mindset and hopefully be a better person. If your father is not living, write him a letter. Even though he will never read it, your children and their children can. Leave a legacy for them.

Happy Father's Day! I hope it is the best one yet.

Blessings!

Dudley